Dieting Mayhem: Why I Should Be Dead Right Now.

So, this was my lunch today:

-Footlong Buffalo Chicken Sub, double meat, double cheese
-About a half gallon of Coke
-Spicy Tuna and Crabmeat Roll
-Bag of Sour Cream and Onion Potato Chips
-Half a gallon of Water
-2 Heaping tablespoons of peanut butter

An hour after:

-1370 calorie shake

An hour later:

-About a pound of spaghetti and 10oz of chicken sausage

That’s only 3 out of six times I will eat today. It hasn’t always been this way. I used to eat clean. So clean it would probably make a normal human kill themselves out of sheer taste-boredom. I am attempting to gain weight for the first time ever. Believe it or not, gaining weight has always been hard for me. Especially in high school and the beginning of college.

High School:
Freshman year I weighed in at a sickly 160-170lbs. Needless to say, I was almost killed on the football field every time I got hit. Once the season was over, I started smashing weights everyday and eating anything and everything.By the time the next season started, I was 6 inches taller, and weighed 230lbs. I wish I still had growth spurts like that. I made it through high school alive somehow and got the opportunity to play college football.

Got to training camp around 250lbs but in terrible shape. College football made me realize I was a horrible athlete so I knew my only hope was to become un-humanly strong. That was postponed several times due to injury after injury/surgery after surgery. I had some pretty lousy surgeries. Two hernias. A stupid ankle. Punched a wall that was much stronger than my hand. Anyway, when football was over, I was a sloppy 275lbs. That was in 2007. I pretty much hung around there until July of last year… that’s when the insanity started.

July 2010 to October 2010:

I lost 51lbs in 15 weeks. Anyone who is serious about losing weight and can’t do it on their own: Go to, hire Shelby Starnes, and try not to shrink too fast. The guy is a genius. I wanted to get as light as possible for a powerlifting competition. I went from 280 to 229 and did not lose any strength. The diet, after a few adjustments, looked like this:

-6 meals a day
-65g protein per meal- fish, steak, chicken, and shakes.
-4 medium carb days a week
-3 very low carb days a week<~~~~ which made me very cranky
-40mins of low intensity cardio 4 days a week
-20mins of interval sprints usually on a bike, 20mins of low intensity cardio 3 days a week
-No gluten
-No dairy

My body fat percentage went from mid 20’s to 5%. I was shredded up, totally ripped, brah! By my own stupid accord, I dropped and extra 5lbs the day before the competition by making a homemade sauna in my hotel bathroom, even though Shelby told me not to do this. Needless to say, I felt like a walking poop-cicle going into the meet. I tore my right semimembranosous (medial hamstring) attempting to deadlift 810lbs. I was very dehydrated and very stupid.

October 2010 to February 2011:

Still eating very clean, just more clean food. Added in 2 cheat meals a week. Cheat meal is code for “entire stuffed crust pizza.” Weighed in at the Arnold Sports Festival at 250lbs and smoked an 810lb deadlift with my hamstring only at about 80%.

February 2011 to Present:

I just don’t care anymore. There is only one goal now: Be as strong as possible. I am already back up to 275lbs just by adding in 2 more cheat meals and keeping everything else relatively clean. I shoot for about 500g of carbs and 300g of protein a day.

Just thought I would put this up because I have received several questions on how/what I eat. It makes more sense to showcase the history of how my diet has evolved than just throw worthless numbers out there. The diet I was on from July to October completely altered my body chemistry, I think. I am stuck at 275 and I’m not getting any fatter? Maybe I’ll take up jogging to get fatter.

Anyway, sorry for the short, pointless post. Thanks for reading. Now that I’ve talked some about sprinting and eating, I guess the next one will be on how to make you an efficient killing machine….

Sprint. Kill. Eat. Eat. Eat. Eat. Eat.


4 thoughts on “Dieting Mayhem: Why I Should Be Dead Right Now.

  1. Luke, I am mostly choking all of it down. I do have a pretty big appetite but, I do a ton of work (a combination of my workouts plus being on my feet all day at work) and as a result of that work, I have a very high resting metabolic rate. I actually had it calculated once in a lab and it is something like 8000 calories a day. Eating to gain weight for me is basically a full time job, if calories ever stop going in, I don't get bigger. I would rather kill myself than eat when I am full but I don't have choice if I am trying to get heavier. If eating doesnt get any easier in the next month or so, I am going to start looking into appetite stimulants like MSG and CCK suppressors.

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